Colonel's Retreat: Delhi NCR's BEST Kept Secret (Luxury Awaits!)
Colonel's Retreat: My Secret, Now Yours (and OH MY GOD, That Pool!) - Hotel Review (Honest Edition)
Okay, folks, let's talk about Colonel's Retreat. Delhi NCR's BEST Kept Secret? Well, I'm about to blow the lid off this… well, retreat. Honestly, before this review, I was kind of keeping it to myself. This place… it's got vibes. And not the forced, Instagram-ready kind. More like, "I've been seriously stressed, and THIS is my escape" kind of vibes. (And yes, that's a good thing).
Accessibility & Getting There: (Because We All Need a Little Help Sometimes)
So, first off, getting to Colonel's Retreat is pretty straightforward. Surprisingly (for Delhi NCR traffic!), it's easily accessible. They offer Airport Transfer, and honestly, after battling the airport chaos, bless them for that. They've got a car park (free, thank the gods!), and even a car power charging station! Thoughtful. Also, essential for me, the elevator is a godsend. Access is pretty good. They have facilities for disabled guests, which is a huge plus.
The Rooms: (My Sanctuary, and Yours, Hopefully)
Let's be real, the rooms are where it's at. Especially after a day of… well, life. My room – oh, the room! First off, FREE Wi-Fi! In all rooms! Praise the internet gods! It had everything: air conditioning (essential!), a gorgeous bathroom with a separate shower and bathtub (and fluffy, perfect bathrobes!), and a bathtub. A proper, soak-your-stress-away bathtub. They've thought of almost everything. And the bed? Extra long. Extra long. Perfect for my ridiculous sleep style, which involves a lot of flailing. They even have a laptop workspace… although honestly, I spent most of my time slumped on the sofa with some on-demand movies, ignoring my emails. (Don't judge me). The blackout curtains! Absolute perfection. So, 10/10 for the room.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: (Because Happiness is a Full Stomach)
Okay, this is where Colonel's Retreat really shines. Food, glorious food! They've got everything! Seriously. Restaurants, a poolisde bar, coffee shop, and even a snack bar. I’m not even going to try to list them all. And the food? Amazing! From the Asian Breakfast (a must-try, trust me) to the Western cuisine, it's all delicious. Coffee/tea in the restaurant, the essential condiments, and even a bottle of water and essentials condiments. And for those late-night cravings? Room service is 24-hour. Seriously, heaven on a plate when you are hungry. They have an a la carte menu, buffet, and even a soup in the restaurants! They offer Asian cuisine and vegetarian food.
And that Pool… (OMG, The Pool!)
Okay, I have to talk about the pool. Seriously. The Pool with a view is spectacular. It’s not just a pool; it’s an experience. I spent a solid afternoon just floating around, staring at the sky, and feeling… well, relaxed. It's an outdoor pool, perfect for soaking up the sun (or hiding under an umbrella, depending on your mood). I’m telling you this pool is beautiful.
Relaxation Heaven & Things to Do: (Body, Soul, and Everything in Between)
This is where Colonel's Retreat truly earns its "retreat" title. They have a gym, and a fitness center, but honestly, I was more interested in the spa. Oh. My. God. The spa. They have a sauna, a steamroom, massage, and even body scrubs and wraps. I opted for the massage, and it was heavenly. Seriously, I emerged feeling like a new person. Fresh. Ready to face… well, maybe not the world, but definitely another delicious meal at the restaurant. They also have a hot water linen and laundry washing.
Cleanliness & Safety: (Important Stuff, Unfortunately)
Let's face it, in these times, this matters. And Colonel's Retreat? They've got it covered. They use anti-viral cleaning products, have professional-grade sanitizing services, and sanitize rooms between stays. They have hand sanitizers everywhere. And the staff? Trained in safety protocols. They also have a Doctor/nurse on call, a First aid kit, and they even have sterilizing equipment! The daily disinfection in common areas. So yes, they take cleanliness and safety seriously.
Services and Conveniences: (Because Life Can Be Easy)
Cash withdrawal? Check. Currency exchange? Check. Concierge? Absolutely! They have daily housekeeping and laundry service. They make your life EASY. They have a gift shop, which is dangerous for me, and a terrace. They have room decorations! They also have a place to host meetings.
My Imperfections:
Okay, look, I'm not going to pretend everything was perfect. There was a slight hiccup with the Wi-Fi (it happens!), but the staff was on it immediately. And honestly, it gave me more time to actually relax. It was a blessing in disguise. Also, I somehow managed to miss breakfast one day… but that just means I'll be back!
Quirky Observations & Emotional Reactions:
I loved the little touches. Flowers in the room. The comfortable seating area. The fact that the staff genuinely seems to care. You can tell they are proud of their work. I felt… safe. And that’s a big deal.
The Verdict: (Run, Don't Walk, To Colonel's Retreat!)
Look, I'm not one for hyperbole. But Colonel's Retreat? It’s a winner. It’s the perfect escape. It’s luxurious, without being stuffy. It’s relaxing, it’s convenient, and the food is incredible. I’m already planning my return. If you need a break, if you need to de-stress, if you just need a damn good pool day (and a phenomenal massage), book now. You won't regret it.
Here's The Deal - The Persuasive Offer:
Tired of the Delhi NCR grind? Craving an escape?
Colonel’s Retreat is waiting for you!
Here's the Breakdown of the BEST Deal
- Rooms starting at [Insert Price Here] – (honestly, that's a steal for what you get! Check their website for current rates!)
- FREE Wi-Fi in All Rooms! (Stream your favorite movies or work in peace)
- The Pool (You. Need. This.) Dive into tranquility and soak up the sun. Or not, if you prefer a shady spot!
- Spa Delights (You DESERVE this!) Book a massage, a scrub… treat yourself!
- Foodie Heaven (Get ready to drool!) Amazing restaurants, every cuisine you can imagine, 24-hour room service. Come hungry!
- Hassle-Free Experience: Daily Housekeeping
- Absolute Peace of Mind: Safety and cleanliness are their top priorities.
- And So Much More!
- Book directly on our website [Insert Website Here] and get 10% off your first stay!
- Limited time offer: This deal won't last forever!
Don't just take my word for it. Treat yourself. Book your escape at Colonel’s Retreat today! You deserve it.
P.S. Tell them the crazy lady who raved about the pool sent you. They’ll know.
Luxury Redefined: Hotel Pal Palace, New Delhi's Hidden Gem
Okay, buckle up buttercup, because you're about to get the unvarnished, slightly deranged, and definitely imperfect itinerary for a trip to Colonel's Retreat in New Delhi and the NCR. Forget those polished Instagram posts; this is the real deal.
Colonel's Retreat & NCR: A Messy, Emotional, and Probably Delicious Adventure
Day 1: Arrival & That First Delhi Belly Temptation (aka, "Don't Eat That Street Food… Maybe")
- Morning (7:00 AM): Drag myself out of the airport in a jet-lagged haze. Seriously, why is airport air always so dry? Anyway, pre-booked (thank god, because negotiating after 20 hours of travel sounds like my personal hell) a car to take me to Colonel's Retreat. This place is supposed to be a little oasis. I hope it's not a mirage. Crossing my fingers for a decent shower and a bed that doesn't feel like concrete.
- Mid-Morning (9:00 AM): Arrive at Colonel's Retreat! The internet lied - it is actually a stunning place. Okay, the architecture is beautiful, the gardens seem to be meticulously manicured, and the staff is incredibly polite. Too polite, maybe? I'm already suspicious. Where's the catch? I'm expecting a hidden camera crew.
- Late Morning (10:00 AM): Unpack, shower (ahhhh, the gods of hot water have blessed me), and collapse on the bed. Realizing I may have slightly over-packed. My suitcase looks like a fashion bomb went off in a tornado. Considerably, my emotional state is already teetering precariously on the edge of chaos.
- Lunch (12:00 PM): The Retreat restaurant. Okay, time for the first actual meal! A chicken tikka masala. I'm in India, gotta do the obvious, right? It’s delicious. But while I eat, I can't help but notice a street vendor outside. The samosas… they look amazing. My stomach is already rumbling, and I'm torn between the safe, predictable tikka masala and the siren song of those crispy, golden triangles. I think, right now, safe is probably the best.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Attempt a nap. Fail. Jet lag is a monster. Instead, wander around the Retreat, admiring the peacocks (yes, actual peacocks. This place is fancy).
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): A very short guided tour of the complex. The guide's accent is a little too perfect? Every sentence is a little too… prepared? I find it unnerving. Make a mental note to ask for a different guide tomorrow. I need some unfiltered humanity, people!
- Evening (7:00 PM): Dinner at the Retreat again. This time, I'm going for something less spicy. Ordering chicken korma. The waiter is so attentive, I feel like I'm being monitored. It's…weird.
- Night (9:00 PM): Bed. Probably staring at the ceiling, wondering if I've made a terrible mistake. And worrying about those samosas. Those darn samosas.
Day 2: Delhi's Chaos & the Quest for “Real”
- Morning (8:00 AM): Breakfast at the Retreat (again). More polite efficiency. I'm starting to crave chaos.
- Morning (9:00 AM): Hire a driver for the day. Negotiating in the morning sun is an ordeal. I feel the heat of the sun like a second skin and start sweating like a pig. Finally settle on a price that seems… okay. Ambitious plan: Delhi sightseeing!
- Mid-Morning (10:00 AM): Old Delhi, Part 1: The Spice Market. This is it! The real Delhi. The smells… oh god, the smells! A heady mix of spices, exhaust fumes, and something indefinably Delhi. It's sensory overload in the best possible way. I nearly get trampled by a cow. Twice. Breathe deeply. It’s like the entire world has decided to burst into a single, beautiful, chaotic dance. I'm completely overwhelmed. But I love it! This is why I came.
- Late Morning (11:30 AM): Old Delhi, Part 2: The Food Stalls. Okay, I know I said I wouldn't… but I saw it: the deep-fried jalebis. Those glistening, syrupy spirals of pure sugar. The vendor is practically begging me to try them. "Just one," I tell myself. "For the experience." They're heavenly. I feel a slight pang of guilt (and a stomach ache brewing), but the happiness outweighs the risks. This is living!
- Lunch (1:00 PM): A sit-down meal in a "famous" restaurant in Old Delhi. I'm getting braver. I have biryani, which explodes with flavour. Real, messy, honest flavour. My face is covered in rice, but I don't care. This is the best meal I may have ever had.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Humayun's Tomb. Beautiful, stunning, majestic. Architecture porn! I wander, mouth agape, imagining the lives that played out here. The scale is immense. The peace is almost palpable.
- Late Afternoon (4:30 PM): India Gate. A very powerful monument. A place of respect. I feel a strange sense of loss. The city has become real to me. The people feel very real.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Return to the Retreat. Reflect on the day. Realise I am exhausted. My shoes now have a fine layer of Delhi dust, and my brain is buzzing with a thousand new impressions.
- Dinner (7:30 PM): Feeling adventurous! Chicken butter with some chapatis. It's nice. But I already miss the chaos of Old Delhi.
- Night (9:00 PM): Crash into bed. Dream of samosas and spice markets. Maybe tomorrow I'll take that street food risk.
Day 3: Agra (The Taj Mahal & Maybe a Slight Panic Attack)
- Early Morning (5:00 AM): Wake up way too early. I was told to leave by 5.30am. The drive to Agra is long, and the Taj Mahal gets busy. Grab the breakfast, packed to go from the Retreat (polite as ever), and start the drive. I'm anticipating this day more than any other.
- Morning (9:00 AM): Arrive in Agra! Or at least, the parking lot near the Taj Mahal. The heat is already intense. I feel like I'm baking in a convection oven. Buy a ticket. The line is long. I sweat some more.
- Mid-Morning (10:00 AM): The Taj Mahal. Oh. My. God. It’s even more breathtaking in person. The white marble gleams in the sun. It's ethereal. It's… overwhelming. Suddenly, a wave of emotion washes over me. I want to laugh, to cry, to just… sit and stare. My eyes well up in a way I never thought. It’s honestly a little embarrassing.
- Late Morning (10:30 AM): Wander some more. Attempt to take photos. Fail miserably (it's so crowded!). Try to take it all in. This is the moment I've been waiting for. Okay, breathe, don't get crushed by a selfie stick. The crowd is truly remarkable. Everyone is desperate to take a photo. I understand, but I can't get a good one!
- Lunch (12:00 PM): A very mediocre lunch in a tourist restaurant. The food is forgettable. I don't even care… The Taj Mahal! That's the only thing that matters.
- Afternoon (1:30 PM): Visit Agra Fort. It’s impressive, really, but my brain is still replaying the Taj Mahal on loop. I'm slightly regretting the visit. Can't they just put on a show to showcase the Taj Mahal?
- Late Afternoon (3:30 PM): The drive back to Delhi. The traffic is horrendous. I'm crammed in the car with the driver in some kind of existential angst (or maybe he just doesn't like my choice of music).
- Evening (7:30 PM): Back at the Retreat. Collapse on the bed. Still processing the majesty of the Taj Mahal. Realize I'm sunburnt.
- Dinner (8:00 PM): Have dinner in silence.
- Night (9:00 PM):
Colonel's Retreat: Delhi NCR's Secret Eden... or Just Overhyped? Let's Dive In! (Prepare for Rambling)
Okay, so what *is* Colonel's Retreat, anyway? Is it really all that?
Alright, alright, settle down. Colonel's Retreat. Think... a sprawling oasis, supposedly. Lush greenery, a pool that *actually* looks inviting (unlike my bathtub), and promises of serious luxury. They bill themselves as "Delhi NCR's Best Kept Secret." Honestly, the marketing is slick. And yes, in parts? It *is* pretty spectacular. Like, the initial "wow" factor is definitely there. Think of it like… hitting the jackpot at a luxury hotel lottery. Except, you know, you actually *pay* for the lottery ticket.
But... well, that "secret" part? Not so much anymore, is it? The Insta-crowd has definitely found it.
The rooms! Are they actually as luxurious as the photos make them out to be? Because those photos… wow.
The rooms... ah, the rooms. So, they are *mostly* good. Let's break it down like my breakfast buffet strategy. First, the good bits: The beds? Heavenly. Seriously, I sank into that thing and almost forgot I had responsibilities. The bathrooms? Huge, with those lovely rainfall showers that make you feel like you're bathing in a cloud. The decor? Generally tasteful, lots of natural light, and a definite "I'm rich, darn it" vibe.
BUT... and there's always a but, isn't there? I stayed in a suite that, bless its soul, had seen better days. The wallpaper had a tiny, almost imperceptible tear. (Okay, maybe it *was* the wine I spilled... but still!). And the TV... kept cutting out during the IPL finals. The HEAT! The agony! It took them half an hour to fix it. Thirty minutes of near-cardiac arrest. So yeah, "luxury" with a whisper of "needs a little TLC." Basically, still better than my actual house, but... picky, I am.
What about the food? Heard mixed things...
The food... oh, the food. This is where things get *really* interesting. They have a few restaurants, a buffet (always a dangerous game), and room service, which, let's be honest, is the main reason I go to these places. The a la carte dining is pretty good, generally. I had a fantastic butter chicken one night; the spice level was perfect - enough of a kick, but not so much that I'd be setting off the fire alarm. The breakfast buffet? A mixed bag, classic buffet. Some stuff was top-notch (the fresh fruit, the omelet station), some stuff was... well, lukewarm and slightly depressing. (I'm looking at you, sad-looking sausages.)
And then there was the room service incident. Ordered a club sandwich at *midnight*. Took an hour and a half to arrive (I was starving!). The bread was stale. The chicken was dry. Seriously considered phoning guest services to sob. I didn't, because I was too embarrassed, but... yeah. Food is a gamble. Approach with caution. And maybe sneak in a packet of biscuits.
The pool scene? Is it crowded? Does it live up to the Instagram hype?
The pool... *The. Pool*. Honestly, the pool is the poster child for Colonel's Retreat. It's gorgeous, right? Big, inviting, surrounded by lush greenery and those iconic sun loungers. Yes, on a weekday? Heavenly! Room to breathe, a gentle breeze, the sound of water... pure bliss. On a weekend? A total circus. Seriously, expect to fight for territory. Kids are bombing, selfie sticks are afoot, and the serenity is... compromised. So, yes, it's Instagrammable. But the reality? Less "exclusive getaway" and more "communal splash zone." Go during the week if you value your sanity.
Are the staff attentive and helpful? Because that can make or break a luxury experience...
The staff... okay, here's the thing. They are generally *trying*. That counts for something, right? Most staff members are very polite and go out of their way to help. I had a minor issue with the air conditioning, which was promptly fixed by an efficient technician. The service at the pool was excellent; the staff were always there to offer chilled water and towels. However, it felt like the staff at the restaurants are still getting trained. You get the sense that they are new to the job and they are trying, but the service feels uneven.
And here's an anecdote that sums things up for me: I once asked for a simple glass of ice. Took three tries, several minutes, and a small expedition to get it. Minor, sure, but those little hiccups can add up. It wasn’t terrible but it wasn't the seamless luxury service you'd expect. Sometimes you get the perfect attentiveness, and sometimes... you get a very slow glass of ice.
Is there anything to *do* there? Beyond lounging and eating?
Ah, the activities! They have a spa (didn't try it, budget, you know), a gym (also budget, running in the morning), and some outdoor games - I vaguely saw a badminton court somewhere. I'd call the activity options… adequate. It's not a thrill-seeking destination, that's for sure. Primarily you're there to relax, eat, and pretend to be a millionaire. (Which, let's be honest, is my main goal in life). You could do some exploring outside, I guess, but to be honest... who wants to leave the pool?
Okay, the big question: Is it worth the price? Is Colonel's Retreat worth it?
This... is the million-dollar question, isn't it? Is Colonel's Retreat worth the price? Honestly, it's tricky. It depends on your priorities. If you're looking for a truly flawless, unforgettable luxury experience… maybe adjust your expectations a smidge. The flaws can be a bit annoying. But, if you want a beautiful escape from the Delhi NCR chaos, a chance to relax, and the occasional moment of Instagrammable perfection? And *if* you can snag a decent deal? Then yes, maybe. I enjoyed it. I'd *probably* go again, but with my eyes wide open – and a stash of emergency snacks. Don't go expecting perfection. Go prepared for a mixed bag. Go for the experience, and the *chance* to have an amazing time. It's close to being fabulous!
Think of it like this: The good bits are *really* good. The not-so-good bits are... well, they're manageable. Go in with tempered expectations, and you might just have a pretty lovely time. And remember the biscuits. Always the biscuits.
